Message to another parent about an online incident

Non-accusatory message to a parent of another child involved in an online incident with your own child.

When to use this templateUse when you know the other parent and the incident is at a level where a direct, calm conversation can help — not where police, school, or platform reporting is more appropriate.

Tone guidance

Open in good faith. Assume the other parent does not yet know.
Keep it short. Detail can come in a phone call.
Avoid labels ("bully", "groomer", "perpetrator") in a parent-to-parent message.
Offer a way to step out of text and onto a call.

Template

Hi [OTHER PARENT'S NAME],

I hope you don't mind me getting in touch. I wanted to flag something between [YOUR CHILD'S FIRST NAME] and [THEIR CHILD'S FIRST NAME] that has come up online, in case you weren't aware.

From what I can see: [BRIEF DESCRIPTION].

I'm not writing to make a fuss or get anyone in trouble — I just thought it was the kind of thing I'd want to know about as a parent, so I'd rather mention it than not.

What I'm hoping is that [WHAT YOU ARE HOPING FOR].

If it's easier to chat by phone, just let me know and I'll give you a ring.

Thanks,
[YOUR NAME]

Fields to replace

[OTHER PARENT'S NAME] — Other parent's first name
[YOUR CHILD'S FIRST NAME] — Your child's first name
[THEIR CHILD'S FIRST NAME] — Their child's first name
[BRIEF DESCRIPTION] — Brief, neutral description of what happened
[WHAT YOU ARE HOPING FOR] — What you are hoping for from the conversation
[YOUR NAME] — Your name

What to attach

•Nothing in the first message. Offer to share screenshots if they would like.
•If you share later, share only what is necessary, and not other children's content.

What not to include

Screenshots of the other child's messages in the first contact.
Demands, ultimatums, or threats.
Any sexual or indecent images. Do not forward.
Group chat copies that include other families' children.

Sources

Parentkind: talking to other parents — Parentkind

Last reviewed: 2026-05-20Next review: 2026-08-20

This is practical educational content to support families. For case-specific concerns about a child's safety, contact the NSPCC helpline on 0808 800 5000 or your local safeguarding team.