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Message to another parent about an online incident

Non-accusatory message to a parent of another child involved in an online incident with your own child.

When to use this template

Use when you know the other parent and the incident is at a level where a direct, calm conversation can help — not where police, school, or platform reporting is more appropriate.

Tone guidance

  • Open in good faith. Assume the other parent does not yet know.
  • Keep it short. Detail can come in a phone call.
  • Avoid labels ("bully", "groomer", "perpetrator") in a parent-to-parent message.
  • Offer a way to step out of text and onto a call.

Template

Hi [OTHER PARENT'S NAME],

I hope you don't mind me getting in touch. I wanted to flag something between [YOUR CHILD'S FIRST NAME] and [THEIR CHILD'S FIRST NAME] that has come up online, in case you weren't aware.

From what I can see: [BRIEF DESCRIPTION].

I'm not writing to make a fuss or get anyone in trouble — I just thought it was the kind of thing I'd want to know about as a parent, so I'd rather mention it than not.

What I'm hoping is that [WHAT YOU ARE HOPING FOR].

If it's easier to chat by phone, just let me know and I'll give you a ring.

Thanks,
[YOUR NAME]

Fields to replace

Before sending, swap every bracketed placeholder for your own details. If a field does not apply, delete the whole line.

  • Other parent's first name[OTHER PARENT'S NAME]
  • Your child's first name[YOUR CHILD'S FIRST NAME]
  • Their child's first name[THEIR CHILD'S FIRST NAME]
  • Brief, neutral description of what happened[BRIEF DESCRIPTION]
  • What you are hoping for from the conversation[WHAT YOU ARE HOPING FOR]
  • Your name[YOUR NAME]

What to attach

  • Nothing in the first message. Offer to share screenshots if they would like.
  • If you share later, share only what is necessary, and not other children's content.

What not to include

  • Screenshots of the other child's messages in the first contact.
  • Demands, ultimatums, or threats.
  • Any sexual or indecent images. Do not forward.
  • Group chat copies that include other families' children.

Related

Reporting: report to schoolGuide: bullying

External sources

Last reviewed: 2026-05-20Next review: 2026-08-20Reviewed against: UK safeguarding practice

This is practical educational content to support families. For case-specific concerns about a child's safety, contact the NSPCC helpline on 0808 800 5000 or your local safeguarding team.