Age-aware TikTok settings for a UK 13-year-old, including DMs off, downloads off, Family Pairing, screen-time limits and what to discuss openly.
TikTok's minimum age is 13. At 13 the account should be locked down to its strictest options: private, DMs off, downloads off, Family Pairing linked, and screen time capped. The aim is not surveillance, it is a calm environment where mistakes are small and recoverable.
Use the steps below as the starting point, then revisit them every few months as the teenager matures.
Profile → Menu → Settings and Privacy → Manage account → Date of birth. If it says 18+ when it should not, contact TikTok support to correct it. Tip: Many under-13 protections only apply if TikTok knows the user is under 16.
Settings and Privacy → Privacy → Private Account → On. Tip: Required at 13. Followers must be approved.
Settings and Privacy → Family Pairing → link to parent account. Tip: Set screen time to 60 minutes on school nights and pause access after 9pm.
Settings and Privacy → Privacy → Direct messages → No one. Tip: 13-year-olds rarely need DMs. Re-evaluate at 15.
Settings and Privacy → Privacy → Stitch / Duet → Friends only. Live access requires 18+ on TikTok, but check the toggle. Tip: Stops strangers using your child's video as a backdrop or for harassment.
Settings and Privacy → Privacy → Suggest your account to others → all four toggles Off. Tip: Keeps the account out of friend-finder feeds.
Sit together for 10 minutes. Agree what to do if a stranger contacts them, what they will show you weekly, and that they can come to you about anything without losing the app. Tip: Promise of "no shouting, no instant ban" makes them tell you sooner.
Red flags to watch for
This is practical educational content to support families. For case-specific concerns about a child's safety, contact the NSPCC helpline on 0808 800 5000 or your local safeguarding team.