Reporting Domestic Abuse in a Household with Children
Children living in a home where domestic abuse occurs are recognised as victims in their own right under the Domestic Abuse Act 2021, whether they witness the abuse, hear it, or live with its effects. Abuse can be physical, sexual, financial, coercive or controlling. Reporting is appropriate whether the abuser still lives in the home, has separated, or is a regular contact. A child does not need to have been directly assaulted for safeguarding duties to apply.
Immediate danger — call 999
If a child or adult is being assaulted, threatened with a weapon, or you can hear violence happening right now, call 999. If it is not safe to speak, dial 999 then 55 on a mobile (Silent Solution) to confirm an emergency without saying anything.
What to report
- •Physical violence, threats, strangulation or use of weapons in a household where a child lives or visits
- •Coercive and controlling behaviour — isolation, monitoring, financial control, threats relating to the child
- •Children directly assaulted, threatened, or used as leverage against the non-abusive parent
- •Post-separation abuse — stalking, harassment, threats during contact handovers
- •Sexual violence within the relationship, including marital rape
How to report
Refuge — National Domestic Abuse Helpline 0808 2000 247
When to use
At any point — to plan, to disclose, to seek refuge, or to think through next steps. Free, 24/7, confidential.
How to contact
Call 0808 2000 247 (free from landlines and mobiles, does not appear on most itemised bills). Online live chat Mon-Fri 3pm-10pm at nationaldahelpline.org.uk. British Sign Language interpreters available.
What to expect
Trained female advisers will work with you on a safety plan, talk through refuge availability, signpost to legal and benefits advice, and help you decide whether and how to involve police or children's services. They can stay on the line while you call 999.
999 / 101 — Police
When to use
999 in an emergency or where there is risk now. 101 to report past or ongoing abuse, request a Clare's Law disclosure, or speak to the domestic abuse team.
How to contact
Call 999 — use Silent Solution (999 then 55) on a mobile if it is unsafe to speak. Call 101 for non-emergency. Some forces also offer online reporting and DA-trained officers.
What to expect
Police should assess risk using DASH (Domestic Abuse, Stalking and Harassment) and refer high-risk cases to MARAC. They are required to consider the children as victims in their own right and refer to children's social care.
Women's Aid — Live Chat and Survivors' Forum
When to use
When phone contact is unsafe, or for ongoing peer and worker support outside of crisis
How to contact
Live chat Mon-Fri 10am-6pm, Sat-Sun 10am-6pm at chat.womensaid.org.uk. Survivors' Forum available 24/7 at survivorsforum.womensaid.org.uk.
What to expect
Women's Aid signposts to local member services and offers moderated peer support. Live chat workers can support safety planning and connect to local refuge.
Men's Advice Line — 0808 8010 327
When to use
For male victims of domestic abuse — in any relationship configuration — and for male carers worried about children in an abusive household
How to contact
Call 0808 8010 327 (Mon-Fri 10am-8pm) or email [email protected]. Free and confidential.
What to expect
Trained advisers provide non-judgemental support, safety planning, and signposting to refuge and legal advice. They can also help male callers think through children's services involvement.
Galop — 0800 999 5428
When to use
For LGBT+ people experiencing domestic abuse in a household with children
How to contact
Call 0800 999 5428 (see opening hours under the LGBTQ+ pathway). Email [email protected].
What to expect
Galop provides LGBT+ specialist advocacy alongside or in place of mainstream services that may not understand same-sex or trans-related abuse dynamics.
MARAC — Multi-Agency Risk Assessment Conference
When to use
Triggered for high-risk cases — usually by police using the DASH risk assessment, but referrals can also come from health, IDVAs, refuges and children's services
How to contact
You do not refer yourself to MARAC. Ask an IDVA (Independent Domestic Violence Adviser), Refuge or Women's Aid worker whether your case meets local MARAC thresholds.
What to expect
MARAC is a meeting of local agencies — police, health, social care, housing, education, probation, refuge — who share information and agree a safety plan. The victim is represented by an IDVA. Children's social care will normally be part of the plan.
Local Children's Social Care
When to use
When the child is in immediate or ongoing safeguarding risk and you want a statutory referral
How to contact
Find the local authority's children's social care number — every council publishes one. Ask for the duty social worker. Out of hours, ring the emergency duty team.
What to expect
Children's social care will undertake a strategy discussion under Working Together to Safeguard Children 2023 and may open a section 17 (child in need) or section 47 (significant harm) assessment. The non-abusive parent should be treated as a partner in the plan, not a co-investigated party.
Evidence checklist
Gather this information before or during your report. Do not delay reporting while collecting evidence — but preserve what you can.
- A safe place to keep notes — a friend's house, a cloud account the abuser does not access, or with a worker
- Date-stamped notes of incidents — what happened, what was said, who saw, who heard
- Photographs of injuries with timestamps; medical records and 999 call records if available
- Screenshots of threatening messages, voicemails, social media posts, location-tracking apps
- Bank statements showing financial control, withheld money, or unexplained transactions
- Names and contact details of any children's school staff, GPs, or workers already aware
What to say
You do not need to use a script, but this template may help if you are nervous about making the call. Adapt it to your circumstances.
"I am calling about domestic abuse in a household with children. There are [number] children in the home aged [ages]. The perpetrator is [my partner / my ex / the children's other parent / a household member]. The abuse includes [briefly describe — physical violence / coercive control / threats / sexual abuse]. The children have [witnessed / been directly harmed / are still living with the perpetrator]. I am calling because [I need somewhere safe tonight / I want a referral to children's social care / I want to plan how to leave safely / I want to report a crime]. I [have / have not] contacted police before."
What happens next
If you call 999, police will attend and may make an arrest. The officer should complete a DASH risk assessment and refer to MARAC if risk is high. Police are required to refer to children's social care. If you call Refuge, the adviser will work through a safety plan with you, check local refuge availability that day, and stay with you on the line while you call other services if helpful. Children's social care will normally complete an assessment within 45 working days under section 17 of the Children Act 1989; section 47 (significant harm) assessments are quicker. The non-abusive parent should be supported, not punished — if a social worker frames protecting the children as the victim's failure to leave, ask for the response in writing and escalate to the team manager. Civil routes include non-molestation orders and occupation orders, available through a solicitor or Rights of Women on 020 7251 6577.
What not to do
- ✗Do not confront the perpetrator about the report — this is the highest-risk moment for serious harm or homicide
- ✗Do not delete evidence of abuse, including messages and call logs, before reporting
- ✗Do not assume you must leave the home immediately — for many victims, planned departure with support is safer than sudden flight
- ✗Do not promise the children that the abusive parent will not find out — promise instead that you will keep them safe
- ✗Do not rely on the abusive parent's account when speaking to school, GP or children's social care — provide your own written account
Frequently asked questions
What is MARAC and how is it triggered?
MARAC is a Multi-Agency Risk Assessment Conference — a local monthly meeting of police, health, social care, education, refuge and IDVAs to plan safety for the highest-risk domestic abuse cases. Cases are usually referred after a police DASH assessment scores high, but IDVAs, GPs, midwives, refuges and children's social care can also refer. The victim is represented by an IDVA and is not present. You can ask any frontline worker, 'Does this meet local MARAC thresholds?' if you think it should.
I am worried social services will take my children if I report
Statutory guidance and the Domestic Abuse Act 2021 require children's social care to recognise children as victims in their own right and to work with — not blame — the non-abusive parent. If a social worker frames the abuse as your failure to protect, that is contrary to guidance and should be challenged in writing. Refuge, Women's Aid, an IDVA or a family law solicitor can support you. Rights of Women run a family law helpline on 020 7251 6577.
What is Clare's Law?
Clare's Law — the Domestic Violence Disclosure Scheme — lets anyone ask police whether a current or ex partner has a history of domestic abuse offences. You can apply online through your local police force or by calling 101. Police review the request and may disclose relevant information to protect a potential victim.
Sources and further information
- Women's Aid — The Survivor's Handbook — Women's Aid
- Domestic Abuse Act 2021 — UK Parliament
- SafeLives — About MARAC — SafeLives
- Working Together to Safeguard Children 2023 — Department for Education
- Clare's Law — Domestic Violence Disclosure Scheme — Home Office
This guidance is for informational purposes. It is not a substitute for emergency services or professional safeguarding support. If a child is in immediate danger, call 999 (UK) or 911 (US) now.
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Last reviewed: 2026-05-22. This page provides general educational information, not legal or professional safeguarding advice. UK helplines and legislation may change — verify current details with the relevant organisation.