Should I just ban the influencers or take the app away?

Outright bans tend to backfire here, because the content's core story is that society silences men who tell the truth — a ban casts you in that story. It's usually more effective to stay curious, watch some of it together, question it, and retrain the feed alongside your child.

Does watching this stuff mean my son is misogynistic?

Not in itself. Most boys encounter it because algorithms serve it, and many are drawn by the confidence and self-improvement messaging rather than the contempt. What matters is whether the attitudes are hardening — which is exactly what calm conversation and other sources of confidence help prevent.

What do I say when he repeats something misogynistic?

Challenge the idea without ridiculing him: 'That's not been my experience — where's it from?' works better than disgust. Ask what he thinks the person gains from saying it. Keep the disagreement about the claim, so he doesn't fuse the ideology with his identity.

When should I be more worried than this?

Take further advice if the language escalates towards hatred or violence, he's in private groups organised around these ideas, or school, friendships or family relationships are deteriorating. Your GP, the school, or the NSPCC helpline can help; where content promotes extremism, it can be reported to the platform and to police.

Harmful content

The feed full of 'alpha male' advice that started to change him

An illustrative composite of a boy's feed drifting towards online misogyny — and a parent who responded with curiosity rather than confrontation, and got their son thinking critically again.

Illustrative composite. This scenario is a realistic composite drawn from the patterns UK safeguarding organisations describe. It is not an account of a real, identifiable child, and no names are used. It is here to make the warning signs and the right response easier to recognise.

Age around 13–15manosphere online misogyny

What was happening

A 14-year-old started watching gym and self-improvement clips after a rough patch with friendships and confidence. The recommendation feed took those signals and ran: within weeks his shorts were dominated by 'alpha male' influencers mixing genuinely appealing messages — train hard, have discipline, make money — with contempt for women and a story that the world was rigged against boys like him. None of it was searched for; it simply kept arriving, and it flattered him.

Warning signs

Signs that were present

• New phrases and jargon that sounded scripted — 'high value', 'alpha', talk of what women are 'really like'
• Dismissive or contemptuous remarks about girls at school, or about his mum and sister, that were out of character
• Framing ordinary setbacks as proof that society is stacked against men
• Hours in a feed of the same handful of influencers, and irritation when they were criticised
• Pulling away from mixed friendship groups he used to be comfortable in

The turning point

A comment at the dinner table — a sneering generalisation about women, delivered like a quote — made both parents look up. The first instinct was to shut it down hard; instead, the parent took a breath and asked, genuinely, 'Where's that from? What do you like about that guy?'

What the parent did

1Started from curiosity, not confrontation — asked what he watched and what he got from it, and listened long enough to understand the pull: confidence, purpose, feeling respected.
2Acknowledged the legitimate parts out loud — wanting discipline, fitness and direction is healthy — so rejecting the misogyny didn't mean ridiculing him.
3Watched a few of the videos with him and asked questions rather than lecturing: who makes money when you keep watching? What does he sell? Do the men you actually respect talk about women like this?
4Talked — including dad, deliberately — about respect, rejection and confidence from their own lives, giving him real male perspective to weigh against the influencers'.
5Used 'not interested' and unfollows together to retrain the feed, and encouraged offline sources of the same feelings: a boxing club, more time with cousins, actual money from odd jobs.

How it turned out

There was no dramatic renunciation. Over months, the jargon faded, the feed diversified, and he started rolling his eyes at content he'd have defended in the spring. What made the difference wasn't winning an argument — it was that no one made him choose between his self-respect and his family, and that the real needs the influencers had been feeding got met somewhere better.

What this teaches us

Takeaways

Manosphere content spreads because it answers real needs — confidence, belonging, purpose — and wraps misogyny around them; dismissing the needs entrenches the content.
Mockery and bans tend to confirm the influencers' story that everyone is against boys; curious questions age far better than lectures.
Feeds drift towards this content from innocuous starting points like fitness clips — a child doesn't have to seek it out to be saturated in it.
Critical-thinking questions about the business model — who profits from your attention and your resentment — often land better than moral ones.

Frequently Asked Questions

Sources & further reading

Last reviewed: 2026-08-22 · This page is educational guidance, not a substitute for emergency services, safeguarding professionals, or legal advice. If your child is in immediate danger, call 999.

This is practical educational content to support families. For case-specific concerns about a child's safety, contact the NSPCC helpline on 0808 800 5000 or your local safeguarding team.